d i m e n s i o n s

When I was much younger, I “ran away” from home several times. I remember one instance quite vividly; I was about 5 or 6 years old and I was angry! For some reason I wanted to show my mother I didn’t have to stick around the place. I could just leave at any moment… and so I did. It was a beautiful, warm day—probably about 70 degrees or so; perfect for such escapades.

This time in particular, I made it a block and a half away (almost to my best friend’s house). It was at this great milestone that I realized I was not receiving the gratification I thought I would. No one was screaming, or crying, or groveling at my feet, begging for my return. After standing in one spot for several minutes, hoping that time would build the tension I desired, I returned home. Wow, that was the most boring trip across the street I can remember!

Anyway, think about what God sees when we run away. I mean, picture billions of your own children running back and forth from party to party.

Well, okay… let me rephrase. Think about two armies; one good, and one bad. You’re supposed to be on the good side, but every day after battle; every Sunday after communion; every morning after a sacred quiet time, you run over to the “bad guys” and you play games with them. You start drinking with them and eating with them. You share battle strategies. You may even gamble your own armor away. After a night of fun, you return to your own camp.

The early dawn is just beginning to rise. On your way to your tent, you see your leader across the encampment, between the rows of mostly empty tents. Only a few loyal soldiers were still around. You catch eyes with your King and all He does is look at you. You begin to feel the guilt and filthiness of what you’ve just done. The food and wine from the night before suddenly turn to ash in your mouth. Everything you once thought satisfying has lost its flavor.

It’s times like this that rouse a fear of what might be done with us. We know Christ died for us and took the wrath that was ours, but what if God did what we deserve. It is these repeated times of betrayal that pose us timid and self-conscious before God. It’s amazing how our attitudes toward Him and affect His reception of us—the prodigal son! The hypocritical and proud will find Him cold and distant, while the penitent and contrite will find Him as He truly is—merciful, generous, and kind.

It’s such a mystery! A.W. Tozer puts it all in perspective…

“The greatness of God rouses fear within us,

but His goodness encourages us not to be afraid of Him.

To fear and not be afraid—that is the paradox of faith.”